Today is a celebration. On May 5th 2010, four years ago, I met the man who has gently and unconditionally taught me how to love again. Here, in honor of our 4th anniversary, is the story of Philip and Laurel.
JUST BE! by Laurel D. Rund
It’s funny about how you meet that special someone in your life at the most unexpected time. I was getting my hair cut and colored one day without any thought other than, I really, really need to have my roots colored. Picture this, a woman sitting in the hair salon chair with her hair sticking up as if she had stuck her finger in an electrical socket. Now come on, this is supposed to be a place where you can look your worst so that you can look your best ~ right?
The woman who does my hair was also working with a gentlemen sitting to the left of me (he was preoccupied with his iPhone.) I paid him little mind, why would I – this was my personal space to relax and be pampered. Out of the blue, my “hair dresser” introduced me to the man sitting to the left of me, her next customer. After squirming with internal protest (I was thinking … HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME,) I put on a smile and politely said hello. Then I quickly turned my head to back to her and said “ARE YOU CRAZY!”
Well, the rest is history, as they say. This man and I began to talk. He liked my name, Laurel, and asked what color flower it was (clever pick-up line if I say so myself). I carefreely said, “if you really want to know who I am, go to essenceoflaurel.com, my website”… knowing that it truly represented the woman I am today, including a picture of me without my hair standing up at all angles. (Thank goodness I also wasn’t having my eyebrows colored, because then I would have looked like a combination of the Marx brothers being electrocuted.)
It took a few seconds for this guy to go to my website (thank you iPhone.) I watched in amazement, once he found the site, as to how he reacted to my art and poetry. It seemed to startle him in a good way, and it was then that we actually began to talk. We could have been at a coffee shop or having a glass of wine together, the imagery of where we were quickly faded away. It was what we were “seeing” in each that piqued our mutual interest.
The long and the short of it is that we did meet for dinner, then a movie, and then on and on and on. What I was experiencing and feeling started to make me nervous because I wasn’t, repeat wasn’t looking for someone and there didn’t seem to be any any red flags which said danger ahead. Having spent the last year plus getting back on my feet after losing my husband, and building a new life for myself, I didn’t want to “lose my freedom.” You know ~ I am Woman Hear Me Roar!
What did this mean to me? I was re-emerging and discovering the woman I am today, and didn’t want to go into a relationship that would sidetrack me on this journey. I had made new friends, discovered my creative spirit and spirituality, and was bringing joy back into my life.
When I told the story of my fears about this newfound relationship to someone very important in my life, she said to me “Laurel, if you are afraid of losing your freedom, you are not truly free. So … Just Be.” Yikes, those words said it all – and I got it!
I thought I would be invisible after my husband’s death. What I didn’t realize is that I just needed to look into the mirror of life and really “see” me. The rest has been falling into place – one day, one hour, one minute at a time.
So, I released my fears and decided to let our partnership form itself as it was meant to be. This man, whom I care very deeply about, has been united with me in a wondrous way because he understands my need to keep true to my “Essence” ~ the woman who emerged after the storm of loss and grief. And I, too, understand that he needs to do the same for himself.
Somehow through a mysterious force, we found one another. Slowly, tentatively, but with intention, we each told the story of our life’s journey. Sharing what lies beneath our outer facades, revealing long-felt feelings, fears, hopes and dreams. Whether by fate or by plan, a synchronistic encounter offered each of us a beautiful and healing balm ~ the gift of renewal and love.
Romance in my 60’s has come with many unexpected gifts. Time compresses, wisdom is stored within and called upon, and I have finally learned to “Just Be.”